Icewulf's Christmas 2004

This poem is for all you ladies and gents who have been with me this past year. My thanks to all of you for putting up with me.

Icewulf's Christmas 2004
-=icewulf=-

The twelfth moon casts its shadow
The party has begun.
Around me lights start to flicker
And shine brightly as the sun!
Music fills my ears,
His Highness` birthday is close at hand.
I exclaim t the world
Oh joy to every man!

In the height of the celebration
I pull back to my corner.
And shed a little tear.
A tear for those I miss
And wish could be right here.

Soon I go back to celebrate
And beam my brightest smile
I thank His Highness for the blessings
For walking with me every mile!

As the music fades,
I turn to leave the celebration.
And retreat into His chapel

I feel his presence in the room
And shed one more tear as I pray alone.

"Your highness I shed this tear in thanksgiving
for a great gift worthy of all jubilation.
The gift of a friend I found in a person,
The one to whom I give this poem."

Paw-etry

The spell is cast,
may it unfold.
Spread through the pages,
as it is told...

Circle open but unbroken...
power down into the ground.

Blessed be.

Agkistrodon Piscivorus Leucostoma

-=icewulf=-

Home on earth and home at sea.

Such a strong adversary.

Mouth so attractive, pure and fair

So concealing its venomous flair.

Sleek and slender. Sultry, seductive.

Quick to strike. Contentious, aggressive.

Approach it not, lest you seek your death

With Trapjaw slithering on your wreath.

C'est La Vie

I watched Eternal Sunshine Of The Spotless Mind on DVD last night...gave me a few things to ponder on, reminded me of stuff, brought back memoirs and lead me to compose this piece after having thought of all those...

C'est La Vie

-rey

Up, down and around we go.
When we'll stop, nobody knows.
Illusions? Fantasy?
Cruel reality?
C'est la vie.
Such must be.

We burn, we douse.
Play cat and mouse.
We love, we hate.
Oh what a fate.
C'est la vie.
Such will be.

Heaven, earth, fire and ice.
Confusion in disguise.
A war only to be won
Should we choose to fight as one.
C'est la vie...
Oh...
C'est la vie.

Echoes Of A Full Moon

Bes emailed me 2 days ago, told me a story, struck me, reminded me of bittersweet memoirs, and then I said:

"I'd rather love with all I have and be hurt by love than never to have loved at all and keep wondering...'What if?'". -icewulf

Bes, I've been there, done that, learned my lesson but did it again anyway. That's love. C'est la vie.

Y'know where to find me....in "there". Love yah!

One more thing...Animo LaSalle!

Paw-etry

Sail Of The New Cycle
(Getting rid of the tattered canvas it sets sail once more.)
-=icewulf=-

As the wind of destiny sets forth its course
No sail dares to go against its bearing.
Gentle breeze or strong gale
Each wind catcher succumbing.
Lo and behold now cometh a new sail!
Aggressive and stubborn to yield to the gale
Fighting its way towards its own destination.
Aiming to challenge destiny and bellow its own call.
Young and strong stands one brave soul.


My Little Cherub
(Happy fourth birthday!)
-=icewulf=-

Neophyte to the world of reality
Outcast still to the realms of darkness.
Enchanted with the smile to bring forth smiles,
Love and gentleness so pure and blameless.
Life at its best, beauty raw,
Entrancing cherub of innocence divine.
Angel immaculate, angel radiant
Now spread your wings and share your smile.
Now spread your wings and stay with me for a while.

Forever Bruised

Forever Bruised

-rey

Infatuation.

Love's sweet prelude.

Invisible hands that touch the heart

Such a blissful start.

Falling.

Metamorphosis to Nirvana.

Death to wisdom's cries.

Blnding light to earthly lies.

Love.

Sometimes you win.

Sometimes you lose.

Sometimes you get cheated.

And are forever bruised.

Rejection.

Words you'd rather not hear.

Reality in life you fear.

Source of your fallen tear.

Withdrawal.

Back to the drawing board

Regroup and plan anew

Time for the coffee that you brewed.

Love.
Sometimes you win.
Sometimes you lose.
Sometimes you get cheated.
And are forever bruised.

Respect.

Swallow your pride.

Hear her decision.

Follow the execution.

Caution.

Not too much not to less

Heed the voices in your head

Beware the road you choose to tread.

Love.
Sometimes you win.
Sometimes you lose.
Sometimes you get cheated.
And are forever bruised.

Betrayal.

Dagger in your back.

And you question why.

Blood and tears from the sky.

Struggle.

Twist and turn.

Can't break free.

Haunted by the memory.

Love.
Sometimes you win.
Sometimes you lose.
Sometimes you get cheated.
And are forever bruised.

Promises.

Sought and heard.

Loveliest words spoken.

Worst codes to be broken

Pain.

It's what remains.

Future gone and faded.

Scars turn you jaded.

Love.
Sometimes you win.
Sometimes you lose.
Sometimes you get cheated.
And are forever bruised.

Realization.

The awful truth.

Hide and run.

Love will haunt you.

Love will get you.

Love.

Sometimes you win.

Sometimes you lose.

Sometimes you get cheated.

And are forever bruised.

Sometimes you get cheated.
And are forever bruised.

Echoes Of A Full Moon

"Why be like someone when you can be better?"

- icewulf

The thought just crossed my mind after having read a thought of some creature who believes that others try to be like him. Hence this quote goes to those who desperately try to be like someone. Before you aim your thoughts in that direction, think. You know you can be better.

"The best person to be is yourself. Why?
Because that's the best person you can ever be."

- icewulf

Waiting

Waiting

-rey

She is nibbling on her nails again. I wonder what it is this time. Hmmm. I checked my watch, two in the morning, she is still dressed in her party clothes but she has been home since midnight. I checked my alarm clock, a minute past two in the morning, yup, it is two. She is definitely waiting for something. She is not a nocturnal creature like I am. I'm sure something is up. She lays on her bed right beside mine, gets under the sheets, then out of them and then back in. She twists and turns once, twice, three times. I stare at her eyes, i see a mix of anxiety, worry and anger, but no tears. Still not a pretty sight.

An hour passes, she tries to reach for the phone, then stops short of reaching it. She looks at me then covers her face with her blanket.

Another hour passes, she checks her watch and grunts.

Five in the morning, I find myself still watching her as she waits for something. Exactly three minutes past the hour, the phone rings. She frantically sweeps the phone off its cradle. "Hello? Hello?!" she says hysterically. "How dare you?! Of all people!" She begins. A series of near screams, high pitched tones and near tears outbursts came forth. And after seven minutes and 24 seconds later she hungs up slowly and gently.

Then she looks at me, her beautiful green eyes made even clearer by the tears waiting to fall. "Sorry about that Rey. Good night and good morning." She takes off her clothes leaving just her favorite pink and blue striped panties on and she heads back under the sheets. I reset my alarm for nine in the morning. "Good night and good morning to you too." Then I turned to face the window and prepared to go back to sleep.

A minute later she crept under my sheets and hugged me. "Rey, was that all I was waiting for?" Her voice clearly starting to break again, and tears ready to fall. "No, please do not answer that question." She said even before I could utter a word. "Hold me." I did, and we drifted off to sleep.

Bee's Eye View

**click on the images for a better view**

Bee's Eye View
photos by rey
















**click on the images for a better view**

Looking Up at Brand Boulevard

**click on the images to get a better view**

Looking Up At Brand Boulevard
photos by rey

**click on the images to get a better view**

Pawetry

Bruised
-=icewulf=-

Beaten up but not bedridden.
Roughed up but not grazed.
Used up but not forsaken.
Ill but barely dazed.
Slave to the pain embraced.
Entranced by the blue-black & purple shade.
Driven by marks of power that fade.

Autumn Metamorphosis

Autumn Metamorphosis

Bounty Of The Hunt

Pinamatnugutan na salin

Credit Cards at Pag-ibig
(Bahagi ng aking puna sa kuro-kuro ni jobarclix)
-=icewulf=-

Credit cards? Buwisit yan parekoy. Kahit dito sa 'Tate mahirap mag-apply sa mga matitinong kumpanya na nagbebenta ng ganyang serbisyo. Ngunit minsan may mga kumpanya rin kung saan napakadali mag-apply ng credit card, kaya lang pagdating ng credit card mo may bill na itong kasama at halos $175.00 na agad ang sinisingil. Bakit? Annual fee, monthly fee, sign up fee, insurance fee, at kung anu-ano pang eklatush. Di ka pa umuutang sa credit card mo may utang ka na...ang gulo.

Dun naman sa mga matitino nga na credit cards, pahirapan naman bago ka nila aprubahan. Tulad din diyan, kelangan may mga bills ka na maipe-presenta, may credit history ka dapat na maayos at matino. Tanong, "Paano ba magkaroon ng maayos na credit history?" Sagot, "Kelangan mo ng bills, mga on time payments sa loans, credit cards, etcetera." Ayun. Umikot nanaman ang usapan. Yun na nga ang ginagawa mo eh! Ika nga ng isa kong kaibigan, "Fuck the heck?"

Pag-ibig kamo pare? Oo, parang credit card yan. Tingan mo ha, mahirap apply-an, mahirap i-maintain, mahirap bayaran, nakakalunod sa utang, mataas ang interest, ang bilis maningil, pero enjoy gamitin, masarap ipagmalaki, pang-build up ng credit rating!

At kung madali makuha ang pag-ibig eh napakaposible na may "catch" din ito tulad ng mag credit card na madaling apply-an. Mataas ang interest, ginagamit ka lang, inuubos lang ang pera mo, nilulunod ka lang sa utang, pinaaasa ka lang na magiging maayos ang lahat kasi may "credit card" ka na.

O, diba? Credit card at pag-ibig magkahawig talaga!

Pawetry

Icewulf's Reply To Athena Of The North Star
-=icewulf=-

Dearest i beg to oppose.
Brokeness is not all he left you i suppose.
He left you, yes, that may be a painful fact.
But he gave you a chance to put your life back on track.

He left you chances.
He left you opportunities.
Don`t let these go to waste,
I know you have great capabilities.

Where to begin you ask?
Take off that mask!
Head high, be proud.
Your sun shines again after the passing of a cloud.

Should you need help,
Here I will be.
Waiting and watching
Well..you know me!

Howls On A Blue Moon

Massive's Darkside
-=icewulf=-

Here's what boredom, photoshop, pictures and coffee do to me.

Click the image for the full & detailed view!!!

Random Howl

29 Care Bears and counting!

I got new ones again!!! Thank God for Hot Topic and for gift cards!

sitting on top of boxes: Laugh-a-lot Bear, Wish Bear (fluffy lil' bear version), Cozy Heart Penguin, Playful Heart Monkey, Lotsa Heart Elephant, Brave Heart Lion, Bright Heart Raccoon, Take Care Bear & Daydream Bear.

top row of boxes: Cheer Bear, True Heart Bear, Do-Your-Best Bear, Funshine Bear, Share Bear & Friend Bear.

bottom row of boxes: Good Luck Bear, Harmony Bear, Love-a-lot Bear, Tenderheart Bear, BedtimeBear & Birthday Bear.

foreground (elevated) : Thanks-a-lot Bear
foreground (seated): Perfect Panda, Polite Panda, Loyal Heart Dog, Baby Tugs Bear, Grams Bear, Baby Hugs Bear & Proud Heart Cat.

The Sixth Pan de Sal

The Sixth Pan De Sal

-=rey=-

Today started like any other regular Tuesday morning for Ian. He woke up at five in the morning, washed his face, brushed his teeth, got into his sweatsuit and started jogging to the nearby bakery with all his problems in mind. Upon getting to the bakery he noticed it was still unusually dark. Even though five in the morning is barely daylight, still five in the morning was a lot darker. He ignored the darkness and kept jogging. Jeepneys and tricycles headed for the market were all he saw on the streets. Quite a few actually.

After a ten minute jog he reached the bakery. He was absent-minded as the baker asked him what he wanted to buy that morning. He did not notice and he did not reply. The baker smiled and asked him a second time, `Sir, would you be having your regular?` Ian snapped out of his daydream state and replied, `Oh, my bad. Yes Mang Joey, the regular.` Ian`s `regular` was five pieces of pan de sal, of which two were a bit toasted and the other three were white and soft and two pieces of kabayan. All of these were to be placed in a plastic, not paper, bag. The baker prepared everything for him and handed him the plastic bag with his bread. As Ian paid the baker the baker asked, `What is with the long face and the absent-minded person in front of me?` Ian tried to crack a smile and replied, `Problems. Just wish I got rid of them. I`m tired of all these trials in my life, I`m tired of having to wait for the right time for anything!` The baker noticed his trembling voice as he spoke. The baker then replied, `Hold on a second, I have something for you.` He disappeared to the back of the bakery where the oven was and came back with one more pan de sal in his hand. `Here, have this, I believe this might help.` The puzzled Ian just looked on as the baker put it in his bag of bread.

Ian left the bakery and jogged farther away from home towards the direction of the park. He usually eats the bread he bought on his way to the park and while at the park watching other people go about their daily workouts. At the park, he worked out and when he was done, he retired to his favorite bench and began eating his still warm bread, saving his pan de sals for last. He was about to throw away the plastic bag when he remembered he had an extra pan de sal from the baker. He took the sixth pan de sal out and stared at it for a while, remembering the reason it was given to him. `What does Mang Joey think this pan de sal is? A lucky charm?` Ian muttered to himself.

As Ian was about to break the bread in two it jumped up and away from his hand and started to walk towards him! He did not know if he would bash the bread with whatever he could grab, scream in surprise or just faint at the experience of it.

`Calm down you sissy.` The bread spoke. `I am losing it!` Ian said in a very alarmed tone. `Sit down and listen up! If you are losing it then just sit down and listen to this talking pan de sal. If you are not then just enjoy this once in a million lifetimes experience. And let me tell you a story, my story.` Suggested the bread. `Uh, ok I guess.` He replied in a nervous tone. And so the bread continued, `You know I was not always like this, a peice of bread, a pan de sal. I used to be wheat planted in the farm of that old baker, Mang Joey. One day he decided to harvest me, and I was not pleased! He took me away from my home in the farmlands! But all he said was, `Do not worry, I have something good planned for you.` So I just obeyed. The next thing I knew I was being milled! Yowch! I was grinded, pounded, over and over inside his mill by the barn. And you know what? It freaking hurt! I did not want any of that! Was that Mang Joey had in mind when he said he had a `good plan`?! Mang Joey just smiled and whispered to me, `Patience. Do not worry I got you.` And so I did. Soon enough I was all white and I was flour. I sneezed everytime I smelled myself, I was all over the place too! Then all of a sudden that baker started wetting me and mixing all these other stuff with me! I was soooooo pissed! Why did he have to mix those things into me? Why did he have to make me dizzy with all that mixing and blending? All he did was smile and say `Stay with me, do not stop, keep mixing, persevere. You are almost there.` And so I did. When all that was done I felt so relieved. Well that was until he started to knead me. At first it was pleasing just like a massage, but then he started beating me around and he started using this one heck of a rolling pin on me! I`ve gone through a lot already and now he starts to beat me? What the heck is wrong with this guy?! Then he smiled, again, and said, `Endure, you can take this, I know you, I am the one who made you into dough.` So I did, but it was hard. Finally he left me for a while and let me settle. Everything ached in me! And just when I was starting to feel better guess what, he shoved me into the oven! After all I did, after following his every word and doing all he told me to do he wanted me to burn! I banged the oven doors begging him to get me out. And AGAIN he just smiled and said, `Have faith in me, I woould not let my masterpiece go to waste. Remember I have something good planned for you.` And so I sat in the hot oven. After what seemed like forever and a day he took me out. I was ok! I was not burned! And daaaaaayyyyym did I smell great and taste great! I asked my baker, `What am I?` He smiled and answered, `Exactly what I planned you to be, something good, very good. You are bread and now instead of just staying in the fields all day you are a masterpiece, my masterpiece.` I just stared at him in awe at what he made me into.`

`Wow, what a story.` Commented Ian. `Did he ever explain to you what all your suffering and pain was for?` he asked further. `Oh yes he did.` Replied the sixth pan de sal. `He explained everything, he told me that he had to take me from my roots and from my home so I can grow into something even more somewhere else. He told me he had to mill me so I can be flour, the main ingredient for his masterpice, he wanted me to be the star of it all. He mixed and blended me because he wanted me to share what I had with the other ingredients and to show me that I could not become the beautiful bread that I am now if not for the help of the other ingredients. He had to pound and knead me painful as it was for me to gain texture, for air to enter the mix and so that I would rise and be puffy as bread. Finally he had to bake me in the oven so that the finished product may be made, to give me the ultimate metamorphosis, to make me burn and sweat away what I do not need and to make me truly bond with everything in me. Like he said. He had something good planned for me.` Ian could only stare at the sixth pan de sal as realization after realization flooded his thoughts.

Again the bread broke the silence, `So whatcha waiting for? Eat me!` Lost in thoughts Ian ate the bread and started walking home. As he passed by the bakery on his way back he noticed something strange, the bakery was closed, a note on the outside read: `As of July 13, 1988, Monday, Mang Joey`s Bakery has moved to 112 Gen. Miguel Malvar Street.` This location was closed since yesterday. Ian could not believe his eyes. He checked the date on his watch today was July 14th. Something else caught his eye, it was not anywhere near five in the morning yet it was only three.

Pawetry

Night Of The Underworld
-=icewulf=-

Ebony of night blankets the horizon
As now begins the Underworld`s night of fun.

At Hades` command the gates burst open
And his acolytes lead their legions of heathen.

Thanatos` minions are out for blood
And are coming forth in one big flood.

Hypnos` disciples awaken at his beckon
To put to mortals to sleep, and make them pawns.

Charon`s ferry, fresh from the Styx
Unloads its voyagers all dead and sick.

Cerberus is unleashed, the hound of doom
Waking with its howl, creatures of the tomb.

Try if thou may, resistance is futile.
If they don`t get thee now, just wait a while.

Twist and tremble, scream and shriek
No matter what thou try thou art too weak.

Not a soul is safe, no mortal secure.
By the strike of midnight, gone is the future.

Pawetry

All Hallow`s Eve
-=icewulf=-

As dusk conquers with crimson skies
An eerie silence sweeps the land.
Chilling winds blow like demon sighs.
All Hallow`s Eve is close at hand.

Seconds pass and mist blankets all.
Streetlights flicker and start to blur.
Shadows multiply, stretch and crawl.
Smell the scents of incense and myrrh.

Hear the echoes of a wolf`s howl,
See the full moon glare from the sky.
Hear the hooting of the horned owl,
See the cloud of bats dive and fly.

Tick tock tick. A few more seconds.
Streets empty in a flash, doors shut.
One more time the wolf`s howl beckons.
Soon airs a scent putrid and foul.

Now the old clock tower strikes twelve.
Its sound sending chills down your spine.
All Hallow`s Eve has now begun,
Try to flee, there`s nowhere to run.

Paradise Found

Paradise Found-rey

Serenity.
A haven uncovered.
Calm meets tranquility.
Peace rediscovered.

Harmony.
Earth meets heaven.
Unity in diversity.
An experience unbeholden.

Beauty.
Color, fragrance & music all around.
Masterpiece of divine creativity.
Paradise found.

Bounty of the Hunt

Master?
-=icewulf=-

Master, a title of which the only worthy beholder is He who is, was and always will be.

Why? To be master is to be in complete control, to know through and through. Alas, everything within perception of the senses, everything real and imaginary, everything conceivable, are brought about by the mind, spirit and heart. Three separate but coexisting driving forces which compose us, and creation. Forces way beyond our comprehension.

How thus can anyone be master? Lest anyone be able to understand, manipulate, conquer and control all three, the heart, the mind and the soul, only then might anyone be called master over one thing, many things, anything or everything.

For now, all anyone can do is, at most, tame.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Halloween is just around the corner...still need to get myself a costume for the office dress up day this Friday, I also want to dress up for Halloween....I wonder what I'll do this year...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I added a wolf howl as background music for the halloween week, will also be posting some Halloween inspired poetry.

Blue

Blue
-rey

Blue.
Broken in two.
Joy overdue.
Sadness in lieu.

Blue.
What to do?
Can`t rely on the crew.
Pity on you.

Blue.
The answer is Blue.
Try it with a diff`rent hue.
Be true. Grab a Blue.

Morning Sun

Morning Sun-rey

seeking warm embrace
turn to the sun, seek its face--
bathe in morning rays.

Bodyshots

Bodyshots
-rey

cold winter morn
add tequila, lemon, salt--
bodyshots galore.

City Sentinel

City Sentinel
-rey

Shadows cast,
Breeze turns cold.
Creatures head home
Back to the fold.

Yet you remain
Loyal to your vigil.
Empowered and driven
Buy unyielding will.

Your shift is over
Step down the parapet.
At ease sentinel
Embrace the sunset.

The Post

The Post
-=rey=-

alone in the dark
keeping vigil, standing still--
faithful to its mark

Five Haikus

Maple Red
-=icewulf=-

maple leaves turn red--
reminders of what were wounds
of a heart that bled

New Alpha
-=icewulf=-

a wolf cub no more--
with the coming of the spring
be a pack`s new core

Snow in the Sahara
-=icewulf=-

fall gentle snowflake
indulge this piece of dry land--
Sahara snowfall

Fall Thunderstorm
-=icewulf=-

winds of fall so cold
clouds gather and lightning strikes--
a view to behold

Shoot for the Moon
-=icewulf=-

some people say yes--
some look at the misty moon
and shoot for a guess

**generally haikus dont have titles..I just wanted to give titles to these ones.

Four Seasons

Four Seasons

(Four haikus tell the tales of a broken heart)

-=icewulf=-

winter

cold as the fresh snow

unyielding to any call--

hibernating heart

spring

try the new wolfhound

bloom like all the daffodils--

heart on the rebound

summer

the heat of passion

flares on the beaches of hope--

heart on a mission

fall

alas winds blow hard

sweeping rediscovered love--

heart broken apart

Pawetry

Echoes Of The Violin
-=icewulf=-

Thoughts of the artist.
Heaves of lonely sprites.

Earth, plant, beast and mist
Beseech thee every night.

Rivers of tears calmed
Instantly as you sing.

Death cast out and shunned
Eased out the pains of sin.

From the Den Archives - February 2001

Originally published in

LAVOXA Footprints

Literary Folio

Vol V No. 1

Nessie

-=icewulf=-

Nessie has always been one of the few persons I fully trusted and looked up to. She was at first, just an ordinary friend, a fellow staffer who became my bestfriend..and then more. With all the times I've spent with her I have learned to observe her simple ways and pinpoint the littlelest and simplest but oh-so-cute things she loves to do, think or say. Let me give you my top ten, all-time favorites.

1. She has that kind of killer smile which not only takes your breath away but also drives you crazy..crazy thinking about what the heck is gong on in her head! Almost always would you find her brandishing that signature smile. However, the reason why she smiles is something else. You can try choosing from a myriad of possibilities. Yes, she smiles that much.

2. She could be a real sweet-talker, a hyperactive yakker, or one of the silent leave-me-in-my-corner types. She could talk herself into and out of almost anything. With her gift of tongue she could get almost anything she wishes, (talk about abusing powers.) When her lips move she could kill you with her machinegun fast talking, (and I am her favorite victim), or she may choose to shut them and deafen you with a booming silence. (Unfortunately, I seldom experience this.)

3. Superior intellect, killer looks, awe inspiring character and don't forget the fats! (Now I am dead!) Name it, she has got it. From wits way above average to looks that kill (literally and figuratively..ok now I am really digging my grave.)From being a prankster, mischievous she-devil to becoming a child-inspiring angel, that is all her. Truly quite hard to believe such exists. But seeing is believing. I saw. I believed.

4. She has that really cute way of promouncing words which require one to emphasize on the "esssss"..ermmm..i meant "s" *chuckle*. She usually gets her tongue stuck somewhere in her mouth but I find it cute that way.

5. Green, green, gren!If it is green, it is sure to get her attention. Whether its a notebook or a slimy frog she will grab it. (It happens on impulse.) Sometimes she will even ask for it..(luckily I have no green underwear..if only you knew how she grabs green things..ouch!)

6. Her perfume..errr..cologne, (she always corrects me on that note.), is her trademark, territorry and where-I-have-been marker. Once you have locked on to her scent, foloow it. Soon enough you would bump into her.

7. This lady loves to sing! And she sings often..too darn often. But it is not the singing that i find cute, it is that unique "touch" she puts into her singing. That sssshivvverrring note. (Beware: Shivering notes may hypnotize.)

8. Her lips twisted into a pout, teary or sharp eyes and downward sloped eyebrows would make kids think of the monsters in their nightmares. But tht is just my Nessie in a bad mood. Yes. I find this cute. (Word of caution: If such behavior and physical appearance is observed in the species vanessious villenous, please keep a safe distance of at least two light years.)

9. Powder time. Needed: a hankerchief, baby powder (preferrably by Johnson's) and the Publications Office mirror.

Step 1: Apply a VERY generous amount of baby powder on the hankerchief.

Step 2: Spread the powder all over the face until she looks like a Kabuki actor.

Step 3: Wipe even the powder on the face and wipe out the excess with the other side of the hankerchief.

Step 4: Take one last glance at the mirror, then ask Rey if she looks ok. And kill him if he laughs.

She does this every now and then and I personally find it such a waste of powder, and quite a daily dose of horror. Still i find it cute.

10. One more thing I find cute about her is the way she reacts whenever I call her pet names, specially "Nessie." She would first give you that adorable little pout, then a tickle or two which means, "You are getting on my nerves hot shot." Then maybe a slap or a nudge. Though it doesn't change a thing, I still love calling her Nessie.

NESSIE! NESSIE! NESSIE! NESSIE! NESSIE!

***to those who have requested to view a picture of Nessie, well, here's what she looks like. I used her picture in one of my early Photoshop Artworks. Click on the image to view the bigger version.

The City of the Goddess
-=icewulf=-

Pawetry

To Lonestar
-=icewulf=-

worry not, i got your back.
put your worries back on the rack.
worry not, i got your back.
lift your veil of ebony black.
worry not, i got your back.
lil babe times two, needs no panic attack.
worry not, i got your back.
i will hold your hand. that's a fact.


To Neversleeps
-=icewulf=-

chin up, head high.
i'll be there when the time is nigh.
chin up, head high.
i'll be there, wont even ask why.
chin up, head high.
i'll be there, need not cry.
chin up, head high.
i'll be there. your strength am i.

Leila

1st Place 2001 Southern Tagalog
Regional Tertiary Schools Press Conference
Feature Writing in English

Leila
-=rey=-

She arrived in a nicely wrapped cardboard box sitting on the passenger seat of my dads car. She had a red ribbon around her neck, a nice coat of ebony black fur, with bluegreen eyes that can give the most piercing stares or the gentlest glances. My birthday gift, a two months old black rottweiler puppy, Leila.

I loved Leila. I would spend hours everyday playing, training, annoying and getting annoyed by her. She would jump out of nowhere and pin me to the ground just to give me yet another sloppy lick on the cheeks or on the lips. She never grew tired of that. She would watch me play sipa and retrieve it for me, and I did not even teach her how to fetch for it! Either she was that smart that she observed that everytime my sipa flew off I needed it back or she just enjoyed playing fetch. On Sunday mornings I would go to the market and often she would follow me. Hard as I tried I can not make her go back home and just wait for my return. Later on she learned to carry stuff and so I made her a custom basket. One with special ping on the handles to make it easy for her to grip with her mouth and carry. When Leila got older she easily carried five kilos of pork without breaking a sweat, and neither did she give in to the temptation of eating it.

Leila was also the most jealous and protective friend I have ever had. She would walk beside me at all times and would check out anyone who approached me. When I seemed to get lost in conversations with friends while she was around she would gently bite at my hand and place it on her, a sign for me to give her a little attention and a good rub. If anyone approached me in a rather threatening manner she would quickly run up front and stand between me and the other person, her eyes seem to burn with fire and pierce the soul of the person in front of her. One wrong move and she was sure to chase the person until the person is too far away to cause me harm, or she would turn the poor soul into chopped liver.

Memories of Leila always bring some of the most beautiful smiles to my face. Sadly the most memorable memoir of all had to be the last.

I remember it well, it was about 11:32 in the evening. It was a dark and windy night, there was no moon and there was a blackout. I was home alone and in my room listening to my portable casette player which was then playing Kaleidoscope World by Francis Magalona. Lightning and thunder started to break the eerie darkness and silence of the night. Suddenly I heard a differend kind of crackling noise, I turned down the volume of my portable casette player. I heard it one more time, it was definitely not thunder. Armed with a huge Maglite flashlight I went down the stairs to the living room, everything seemed ok, the sliding door was locked & the windows were all closed. "Living room clear." I mused to myself, and just as I was about to turn around and check the dining room and kitchen, I caught a shadow moving and before I could shine my flashlight on it I felt something grab me from my right side. Before I knew it a man dressed all in dark colored clothing had a .38 caliber revolver pointed directly at my head. He entered the house through the dining room door by breaking it open. I was done for, I thought.

He asked me where all the money and jewelry were and demanded that I keep still unless I want to die early. He was about to drag me to the masters bedroom when he changed his mind and said he would just kill me instead. I froze at the thought. I was about to say something when out of nowhere a second dark shadow caught the corner of my eye and the next thing I knew the armed burglar was screaming in pain. Leila! She jumped the burglar from behind and bit him right below the neck on the right shoulder, and there she hang on not wanting to let go, a ferocious growl coming from within her throat. The burglar suddenly in a panic threw himself to the floor which caused Leila to loose her grip. The distraction Leila provided was all I needed, things happened fast, in a split second I heard three shots fired but I did not care at that moment and with a quick flick of my right foot I kicked the gun off the shivering right hand of the burglar after I heard the third shot fired. I turned around and as I landed my right foot I raised the left one to hit him squarely on the cheek and knock him down. The robber looked dizzy and his head fell on one of the marble steps, he lay unconscious.

I was just about ready to celebrate when I heard a faint whining..Leila! Her body lay somewhere between the living room and dining room, her chest was moving slowly up and down, she was still breathing, but aside from that she was motionless. "Stupid dog!", I thought. She was wiling to sacrifice her life for her best friend. She had two gunshot wounds, one on the chest and one on the right hind leg. She was bleeding badly, I knew she would not make it anymore, the chest wound was too much, it probably hit a lung. I looked at her sad eyes, tears were there, but still she looked at me straight into my own teary eyes. She tried to bite my hand and did her best to pull it towards her, she wanted another rub. "Easy girl, you did very good tonight. Too good.", I told her with a cringing voice.

As I looked at her I remembered all the days we had. All I taught her and more importantly all she taught me. Patience. Perseverance. Responsibility. Self-control. And now most importantly, the meaning of unconditional love and faithfulness.

She whined as if relieved as I rubbed her behind the ears. She stared at me straight in the eyes one more time and then she was gone. Rain started to pour like crazy, the neighbors started coming to help and ask if I was okay. All I could do was stare at their alarmed expressions, and cry.

So after seven years of fun, laughter, crazy antics and annoying each other, we parted ways, Leila and I. I was sure lucky to have her as a pet, more importantly, as a best friend. But I was not the only lucky person that night. That burglar was lucky too since the neighbors came at once and took the gun away from my sight.

My life will never be the same again, thank you Leila. I love you and I do miss you.

Prowls on the Net

I am 65% evil.





And the results say I just crossed over the Border into the Evil Zone. Yeeaaaaahhhh riiiiight. They have not a clue.


Are you evil? find out at Hilowitz.com

Expressway? No. Freeway.

Expressway? No. Freeway.
-=rey=-

I was coasting through the notorious afternoon rush hour traffic at about 50 kilometers an hour. Everyday, I go through the exact same situation and see the same things. But today seemed different.

Slowly the 50 kilometers an hour cruise became 40, then 25, a few minutes later I was at a complete stop. That is the South Luzon Expressway for you Rey. I muttered to myself. Instead of getting all frustrated and bursting my nerves, I rolled down the window and took a look outside. Just as I expected, the skies behind me were crystal clear, and the skies ahead were dark and heavy, laden with smog. The air in Batangas sure is a lot cleaner than the air in Manila.

I was still looking up to the skies when I got distracted by a flock of pigeons that took off from some of the pine trees lining up the expressway. Off they flew to my right hand side, towards the direction of Mount Makiling.

I rolled up my window. Traffic started moving again. After about half an hour another complete stop. Once again I rolled down my window. There were fewer trees now. Buildings are now situated a lot closer to the expressway at this area. I am near Susana Heights, I presumed. Suddenly, a fork of lightning and the loud crack of thunder that followed startled me. Heheh. Another common weekday afternoon sight and sound here at the South Expressway during the rainy season. The Mitsubishi Galant in front of me seems to be getting ready to move, it has been revving up its engine. Soon enough we roll again.

Five minutes later the trees are all gone and buildings are lined up everywhere. As for the traffic, it is still there. As expected, for one more time another complete stop. I thought about rolling down the window again but heck, I am surrounded by buildings now and the cars are a lot closer to each other. I am much more in danger of dying from carbon monoxide poisoning by rolling down my window than from staying in my car with the air conditioner on. Where am I now? Sucat? Maybe.

Out of the blue another loud rumble is heard, but not that of thunder. Then a gigantic thing crosses the skies above me. Oh, I am by the international airport runways now.

After what felt like forever and a day (which actually was only 15 minutes) traffic started moving again. Just a minute or so later there it was, the cause of the miles long traffic jam. A gasoline tanker lay on its side. Thank God this one was empty.

Out of curiosity I tried to read what company owned and operated the fuel tanker. The rear was so badly scratched I could hardly figure out the name. Aha! Arco. Vendors of some of the cheapest fuel in Ca..li..for..nia? What the hell?! What was an Arco tanker doing in the South Luzon Expressway?!

Then it dawned on me. This was NOT the expressway. I was homeward bound from work and I was currently driving down the 134 freeway going west. I was then in Burbank, California. I had to do a reality check a couple of times before I finally snapped out of it. It felt too much like the Philippines. Like the places I frequented most. Sadly everything had an explanation.

The smog up front was because of the city of Los Angeles. One of the top ten most polluted city atmospheres in the world. The pine trees I saw earlier and the birds and the mountain were all situated alongside the westbound 101 freeway which I merged from. Thunderstorms are not uncommon during the beginning weeks of Fall. And the landing plane was meant to land at the nearby Burbank airport.

I felt like I was sinking into the car seat, and I was just about to entertain my disappointment and my frustration because of the traffic. However, I caught myself and found a reason to smile. This traffic, this freeway, however unpleasant, even for a while, gave me a glimpse, took me back and made me feel what it was like to be in a place I called home.

Act Two Scene One

Act Two Scene One
(Demigods debate the fate of Felicia)
-=icewulf=-

Set forth thy gaze.
On her battered soul.
Burn down thy blaze.
And dispose thy coal.

Too late for that.
The game has been set.
Woe to that brat.
Time to collect debt.

What then to gain
From thy little spree?
Freedom from pain?
Thats not like thee.

What then to lose?
Give me time to play.
Shes tied her noose.
Ha! Oh happy day!

Thy ways stay strange.
But thy design, clear.
Watch that deranged.
Stupid. No fear.

Entertaining.
She knows not her fall.
Ill keep watching
As she fights this squall.

Why just keep watch?
Why not end it now?
Open a scotch
And set down your brow.

She brought this up.
She must bring it down.
Shant make it stop.
Should she even drown.

Pawetry

Is It Just Me?

(The Icewulf thinks out loud)

-=icewulf=-

Is it just me?

Is it just me?

Or can they just not see.

Everything is bright as day.

Easy for me to read as I may.

Is it just me?

Is this really all they can be?

I give them the benefit of the doubt.

Or should I just let it all out?

Is it just me?

But is this their concept of "we"?

Please tell me this is not it.

I'll give you time.

I'll wait and sit.

Is is just me?

Or can they just not set things free.

Leave it be, let it flow.

Are you afraid true colors might show?

Is it just me?

Or is there a conspiracy?

It saddens me things have to be this way.

Please don't wait for me to jump into the fray.

Is it just me?

Come on, tell me.

Or have you forgotten your creed?

Your consciences you do not heed.

Is it just me?

Pawetry

Sunset Whispers -=icewulf=-
Ocean breeze, Sunset skies. Beaming smiles, Tears in my eyes.
	Feel the sand so cold, view the vast blue lawn. Touch the warm hand to hold, Feel the shoulder to lean on.
Fill the breeze with stories. Wash our pains with the waves. Celebrate our little glories With sunset whispers - our silent raves.

Echoes of a Full Moon

"My enemy's enemy is NOT my friend. He's my tool, my pawn."

-icewulf

From the Den Archives - Spring 2004

Eyesbreaker
-=icewulf=-

In a span of three days the ice is broken. Things turn around. I did not expect to feel this way so soon and honestly, I do not know if I should be glad or not.

From a state of total introspection, wallowing in depression and fears, I now stand high on the peak of Olympus. How? Beats me. Divine (or demonic) intervention most likely.

Due to a string of events my wheel starts to spin and I find myself back on top. Some feel good that I feel this way, for some heheh. I see a few raised brows. Few know aout what happens when I am back on top. People like cynic Kiko, forever critic Concon and subtle but crazy I.N. are part of the handful who know of the silly antics, the freaky thoughts, the wildcard decisions, the power trips, the unpredictability and the suttle vengeance I exact when my hype is up and my moods are good. They are also but the few who have seen my "bitch mode" on. So, do I celebrate? Or do I start to mourn?

Whut-the-hell?! This is not the time for that, I have been in darkness for a while now. And so now I start to party, but pardon me if I happen to crush you as I dance and prance on my way to the stage. It is nothing intentional nor personal, you were just..well..in the way! If you have any problems with that, I am sorry but I have no time for that coz this is my party now and there are no rules, therefore, I do not care about anyone tripping and freaking out on this. Just chillax! Either you kick back with me, or you can hit the road and hit the sack.

What to do now? Back to the roots. The basics of having fun. First find a target. Done. Targets selected. What to do now? Second, observe. Never underestimate observation. It is a good source of ideas, information and entertainment. What next? Third, use data collected from observations and formulate a hypothesis, then (fourth) experiment. This is where it really gets fun. Watch the eyes dude, watch the eyes.

I have only been back to this state for a few days and the laughtrips are great, too bad sometimes I am only laughing quietly in my mind as I am surrounded by my lab rats. I am not content yet though. And for that there is only one solution. I need more experiments to conduct. What happens next? Observe and see.

Pawetry

Salamas DaTerd!

-=icewulf=-

Isang malaking pasasalamat

Sa aking natatanging kaibigan.

Mahalay.
Di maintindihan.
Makulay
Maaasahan.
Matipuno.
Kalbo.

Salamat Leo.

Pawetry

Silence
-=icewulf=-

Silence.
Not a whisper. Not a breeze.
Ironically, the sound of Death.
And the music of Peace.

Silence.
What does it bring now?
Fear? Hesitation?
Or did someone disavow?

Silence.
Is this part of the norm?
Or is it merely
The calm before the storm?

Silence.
Foe or ally?
Two edged sword.
The best form of lie.

Silence.
Unpredictable but vicious.
Like tempest winds
Capricious.

Silence.
My favorite weapon.
The unheard enemy.
Vanquishing both reason emotion.

new blog, thx ken2ts!

ken2ts....puta ka!
would like to say thanks for helping me set up this blog, puta ka talaga!

Everyone...
Welcome to a new chapter!
To those who have continuously supported, read, critiqued and despised my Even Angels Fall Xanga, thank you! I welcome you to the yet another chapter... I could only hope that you be as honest and open as you guys have always been in my past online blogs and xangas...
On with the new posts and comments!